Or 31 to people who are supposedly blood related....but I digress.

I have finally worked so much stuff out this year, it's been a crazy up and down year. I have found my career finally, and I have started to make my raw talent work for me. My bipolar is now beginning to get easier to control, and I feel better with the people I want around me.

I have found though only a few family members will ever be worth it, and that my own family that I have created is my happy place.

For me trust and support is the key, I have that and some good blog friends too.

Music of today is utter shite, except for about 6 bands, the rest mime or use computerised vocals.

I will also be moving soon, and that is when I can cut all ties with the past that made me feel I had to be something else.

Jealousy is not something I have in me, although I have been told that that is why I acted like I did towards some people, infact it is because they clashed with me and bitchy.

I do however know for damn sure I love my daughter so much, and I hope I never make her feel like I was made to feel.

I have also had some good news over my real father, so it is looking good....

But tiny steps for this new 30 yr old, and let's hope I keep on moving forward.