Some people are pretenders, a few are pleasers, a few are helpers, a few are leaders, and the others are lost.

I have had such a crazy month that I've come to see what people are like, even online. I have a big day ahead of me, and I can only count on 3 people. I missed my ex for the first time on saturday, because every year for the last 11 years, it's been us having a few drinks, and laughing at the crazy shit that is the Eurovision song contest. I realised although i never opened up about stuff, and i never told him about the things that made me happy, he was one of the few people that was a friend.

I keep getting the tremors more often now, I know I haven;t blogged about this, but i shake after sugar a lot, and recently tremors have started down my right hand side. I already have severe arthritis in both my wrists...some days i cant write, and typing takes the piss. Yeah funny how I have listened to people talk about pain, when secretly at times I wish I could cut my arms off, as the pain is so severe, and with the weather changing constantly, my wrists ache all the time. I also have it right knee, because of an old injury, same with my wrists. Plus i have the shortening of one bone which is painful on top.

Now for the happy stuff, Ive been fixing my house up, because I feel a change was needed. My dog has rationed her magnet intake lately, so maybe she prefers the cheap crap dog food. I have a job placement, but nothing permanant as the guy noticed in my interview how i was reacting, and asked my job agency if i had any medical issues, they admitted it was bi polar, and i found out he has the same thing, so he wants to help me out. I'm seeing him thursday.

I saw my old girlfriend, she confused me for a day or two, she's not as stunning as she once was...but I realised I am straight...thank god. Too much emotional BS with another woman.

On a lighter note, I am on virgin phone network, pay as you go, and they give you rewards, well over the last 3 years i've saved up £100, i got me a new sony ericsson...and i love it...been ages since I got anything new.